Wednesday, January 23, 2008

UPDATED!!!! Streaky Blogger

Okay, so I'm back, but not at full strength though. I've lost a lot of my desire to write. Blogging every other day was tough. It took a toll on me mentally. Being mentally tough has always been a weakness of mine. Even as Boy Scout I felt guilty reciting the last few lines of the Scout Oath, "To keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight." I'm usually awake... but not mentally. I'm a day dreamer. Just today as I opened up the internet to browse over to my blog, I got lost on the Apple site watching movie trailers. My life could be compared to your typical shooter in basketball. Some days I'm on fire, but other days, I couldn't pee into the ocean. Is there something wrong with me? Is this the mid-life crisis every one's warned me about. I hope not.
Maybe I can blame my lack of mental stability on an accident I had as child. Actually... I could probably point to several, but we'll start with this one. When I was about five years old, I was playing with a skateboard on our driveway. Sidenote... I'm not sure if it was my skateboard, but I highly doubt it because my parents were too cheap to buy me cool toys. My dad is an accountant with an extra large rubber band on his wallet who refused to get his kids anything he didn't have as a child. As for my mom, I don't know if she was part of my dad's master plan to NOT spend money on cool toys from the beginning, or if she was promised lots of exotic trips when the kids left the house. I'm just not sure. I don't have any physical evidence, but by the time I was four, she was definitely on board. Okay, back to the story. The driveway was somewhat steep.
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Well, that's as far as Jeff got. He wrote that early this week and told me he's not ready to post yet. He just needs a little encouragement. I am going to post what he has. The rest is to be continued...........
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Okay, so my mom read the blog and fired back a response. She sounds a little upset:

"Jeffrey, Your dad and I may have been just a little tight, but I don't think you kids suffered in any way!! I think you have all turned out pretty darn good. Wonderful children, now adults, with children of their own. Let's see how well you do!! Love you brown eyed boy!! Oh, and by the way, I do think the skateboard was yours!! Or maybe it was Kyle Brown's. Remember that squirrelly little Brown kid, down the street?? "Head On, rub directly on your forehead" "Head On, rub directly to your forehead" " Head On, rub directly to your forehead" If you haven't seen this obnoxious TV commercial on CNN then you won't understand the humor in it!! You went "head on" into Scottie Mac's truck!!! More power to ya big guy.....love ya mom"

I love my mom. We are very similar. Did you notice how she got distracted and changed subjects in the middle of her email? Mom, you are special. You're so special... I'm going to let you finish the skateboard accident:

"Now we all know the story of the Great Hiawatha, a narrative poem by the American poet Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, I am sure we are related, since my poems of the grandchildren will be legendary someday also...long, long, way long, after I am gone, anyway, I guess Jeffrey was trying to become legendary in his own mind, by imitating the great Indian warriors who would scalp their enemies in times of war, gloriously blazing through the camp, scalp in hand, yelping, dancing, celebrating over their victory...can't you just picture it?? Maybe a little too "heady" for some of you, oh, sorry, that was such a "hairbrained" comment, at any rate, what a sight! Well, Jiffy Boy had it backwards!! Bravely the little warrior got on his trusty, little, skateboard, belly first, and decided he would go on the war path. Zooming like an arrow down our steep driveway, he could feel the breeze rushing through his hair as he and his trusted skateboard Pronto rode to victory......onward and forward they flew not seeing the immediate danger which lay ahead of our brave, little warrrior. Alas, a parked truck, lay in wait for our little Indian boy, Hia"scoff"a. As our little brave, bravely braced himself, he rode UNDER the truck. The cutting steel of the belly of the truck, grabbed Hia"scoff"a's beautiful, black hair and scalped the little Indian boy, much to his humiliation and horror!! Oh, alas, no war dance tonight mamma!!! In shame he went, not crying, brave little Indian boy, to his beautiful mother, Indian Princess Lovealoveahooeyhop (that's me, if you couldn't tell) to which she brillantly stated, "Gee, I wonder if I should take you to the doctor." You see, the lovely Princess was not at all flustered or panicked, having seen many wars daily with her lively, little Cooper Indian tribe. Gore and blood, as well as trips to the emergency room were pretty common around this camp. Luckily, a good friend, Warrior Scotty Mac, said, "Ah, yeh, I ah, think you better take him". Twelve or maybe it was thirteen, or it could have been more or less stitches latter...it was a LOT, I know that, the little warrior and his beautiful Princess mother headed home, back to the tee-pee to tell the tale 'round the campfire that night. And so you see, a lesson had been learned..."Be a smart Duckee, No more skateboard around the Truckee!!" The End "

Okay, I'm about to wet my pants. That was great mom. She is so creative. Mom, thanks for the poem. Well, I hope you enjoyed the entry. Mom, was that you? Smells like Cooper.

3 comments:

Kenningtons said...

Coop!! We're so happy to see/read that you are on your way back into blogging!

Anderson's said...

Jeff, that is a funny story. I have never heard that one! Hey, you are better that I am with my blog. New Years resolution is to be better! Love you guys

J Shoe said...

When is the next posting?